Silence

[Eclipse]

Silence

Something here is out of place.
These echoes haunt this tomb.
Echoes of the inscription recited, reverberating
Off the whirlpool of marble encasing me.

Wondering what it read, and not caring,
The silence is so loud, a cacophony of nothing
Driving me deeper into the depths, exploring
The realms of my insanity and repetition.

With nocturnal eloquence spewed,
Upon the parchment beneath my hands.
Thoughts begin to morph, to form meter, and pathetic rhyme.
But making sense of nothing, only praising ethereal things.

Gazing into the disappointed face of a celestial being,
The moon frowns upon my silence.
This mausoleum, this temple, this prison I chose
To decorate, to adorn with all the shame, this finery of silence.

[T.J. Barber]

This was depressing. Great write and placement. This piece reminded me of a great deal of things in my own life. It somehow silently reminds you.
Good Job.

[bloodredtears]

i love this...it makes me think of all the times i've felt emptied of emotion, even so much that i can't write.. great job!

[sweetest17sin]

yes, i definitely agree w/ what was already said. nice job!

melissa!

[Eclipse]

thank you for the replies. they're greatly appreciated. and yes this poem is about sadness and depression but mostly about the emptiness of it all. It was hard to write cause it's difficult to describe emptiness. I'm glad you liked it.

[SilverEyes]

Wonderful write. It was almost hypnotic. The descriptions and flow came together perfectly. You did a very good job of describing the emptiness of sadness and depression.

[Alex'z Death Chic]

Hmm... I love your choice of words and how you stich them together as if forming a wonderful pattern. Absolutely brilliant. At first, you gave me an image or someone in their coffin in a mausoleum, alone in silence but then for some reason, you gave me this envisage of someone wanting to die/to be buried and is staring at someone's tomb, again alone in silence. You've managed to describe both the person in the poem and the silence that haunts the person but sometimes it makes me wonder... What it silence anyway? coz I've never experienced it...

[Eclipse]

yes it is almost like someone waiting to die. Because this poem is about how everything has gone and left and things are supposed to mean something now, but all it is, is silence. and with silence, what is there to do but to wait and die?