Post by Eclipse on Jun 21, 2004 10:19:47 GMT -5
Rant
Sick and can’t seem to stop.
Can’t express.
The words are flowing but nothing’s making sense.
And I’m itching to be heard.
Trying to channel what I feel
Into meter and to rhyme.
But I’m failing horribly
In between the stanzas.
When this is my outlet,
I’m just hiding behind metaphorical phrases
And plays on words.
I’m writing and deciphering
What I was trying to say.
But nothing’s making sense.
And I’m struggling to express
The blan reality that I feel.
Is there ever some where
I can find the real me.
Release all the tension
Of....of wanting...To find myself.
Or rediscover what I was.
Or make something that I can accept.
I am words and beats
And I am couplets in my head.
I am unwritten sentences,
And choppy lines.
I’m thoughts that I can’t find
The natural eloquence
To let flow through fine tuned fingertips.
Clicking and tapping out the letters
Like morse code
I’m entranced.
There’s music blaring and the minutes are passing
Quickly.
The notes hardly reach my ears.
Disconnected and disjointed.
Not broken but unglued.
Like ripped paper not completely torn
From its parent.
I’m hardly sure of what I’m saying
But I’m hoping that it will make sense.
And I put it up for ridicule
Like everything else in my life.
I want to hide it
But I want to share.
Because maybe in others interpretations.
I can find what I’m trying to say.
I’m never sure where I’m going in my words.
Or where I’m going to end up.
[Ha, if I ever stop at all]
I don’t know the message I’m trying to convery.
I don’t know if I sound literate
Or scholarly.
And I pretend that I don’t care.
But in a sense, that would cover
My complete and utter confusion.
It’s like something’s dead inside of me.
And it’s rotting.
Decaying because I can’t find a way
To expel the nonsense coming from my hands.
And the stupid pen strokes from my fingers.
I can’t figure out what to say or why exactly I’m rambling.
But I’m hoping that it’s going to go somewhere soon.
Typing faster than I can think.
These staccato flashes in my head.
I never found bliss in ignorance.
So why, might I ask, can’t I find what I’m looking for?
Well, I guess it’s might be due to the fact,
That I really have no idea what I lost.
::wipes forehead:: whew. that's all a mouthful, isn't it? yeah i know it's long and it doesn't really get to a point or go anywhere...but I just let my fingers go on this one.
Sick and can’t seem to stop.
Can’t express.
The words are flowing but nothing’s making sense.
And I’m itching to be heard.
Trying to channel what I feel
Into meter and to rhyme.
But I’m failing horribly
In between the stanzas.
When this is my outlet,
I’m just hiding behind metaphorical phrases
And plays on words.
I’m writing and deciphering
What I was trying to say.
But nothing’s making sense.
And I’m struggling to express
The blan reality that I feel.
Is there ever some where
I can find the real me.
Release all the tension
Of....of wanting...To find myself.
Or rediscover what I was.
Or make something that I can accept.
I am words and beats
And I am couplets in my head.
I am unwritten sentences,
And choppy lines.
I’m thoughts that I can’t find
The natural eloquence
To let flow through fine tuned fingertips.
Clicking and tapping out the letters
Like morse code
I’m entranced.
There’s music blaring and the minutes are passing
Quickly.
The notes hardly reach my ears.
Disconnected and disjointed.
Not broken but unglued.
Like ripped paper not completely torn
From its parent.
I’m hardly sure of what I’m saying
But I’m hoping that it will make sense.
And I put it up for ridicule
Like everything else in my life.
I want to hide it
But I want to share.
Because maybe in others interpretations.
I can find what I’m trying to say.
I’m never sure where I’m going in my words.
Or where I’m going to end up.
[Ha, if I ever stop at all]
I don’t know the message I’m trying to convery.
I don’t know if I sound literate
Or scholarly.
And I pretend that I don’t care.
But in a sense, that would cover
My complete and utter confusion.
It’s like something’s dead inside of me.
And it’s rotting.
Decaying because I can’t find a way
To expel the nonsense coming from my hands.
And the stupid pen strokes from my fingers.
I can’t figure out what to say or why exactly I’m rambling.
But I’m hoping that it’s going to go somewhere soon.
Typing faster than I can think.
These staccato flashes in my head.
I never found bliss in ignorance.
So why, might I ask, can’t I find what I’m looking for?
Well, I guess it’s might be due to the fact,
That I really have no idea what I lost.
::wipes forehead:: whew. that's all a mouthful, isn't it? yeah i know it's long and it doesn't really get to a point or go anywhere...but I just let my fingers go on this one.
this is amazing. I enjoyed reading this, muy mucho. You blew my mind away 