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GAP
Apr 12, 2004 22:35:36 GMT -5
Post by SilverEyes on Apr 12, 2004 22:35:36 GMT -5
The moon has fallen
Making way for the sun
To light the way
For hundreds of children
Both young and old
As they walk to live
But they do no more
Than survive
Hour upon hour
With squinting eyes
And failing fingers
They work sewing
Hundreds of
Shirts and pants
Only to make
Thirty five cents an hour
When the moon falls
The children can go
But only
If they meet their quota
Famished and fatigued
They stagger home
To places lacking
Running water
The shirts they made
The pants too
Are sold in droves
For at least
Thirty five dollars
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GAP
Apr 13, 2004 16:21:30 GMT -5
Post by angel on Apr 13, 2004 16:21:30 GMT -5
That was very nicely written, and gave good imagry. It seemed like it needed to be more intense though. It got my attention, but it didnt grab me, and I think your intention is to really grab the reader, and make them feel for these people. Nice perspective. I think it could be more intense, but I still like it. Nice work.
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GAP
Apr 13, 2004 18:48:45 GMT -5
Post by John Barnett on Apr 13, 2004 18:48:45 GMT -5
I really enjoyed this write April, it has great imagery and truth behind it
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GAP
Apr 14, 2004 12:00:11 GMT -5
Post by ::..::FoX::..:: on Apr 14, 2004 12:00:11 GMT -5
This is great, I like your word usage, nice work!
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GAP
Apr 17, 2004 18:27:34 GMT -5
Post by bloodredtears on Apr 17, 2004 18:27:34 GMT -5
wonderful job...very serious issue here...great job! imagery is wonderful too! good job!
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GAP
Apr 17, 2004 20:26:24 GMT -5
Post by Tania on Apr 17, 2004 20:26:24 GMT -5
I really like this poem as it illuminates an issue of sweatshops using children so that big fashion houses such as the fashion label "GAP" profits from their misery.
Excellent poem.
Tania
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GAP
Apr 19, 2004 5:05:34 GMT -5
Post by KG on Apr 19, 2004 5:05:34 GMT -5
This realy isn't an issue. If you stopped allowing these over-seas buisness' then these children, who support their families, would be out of a job that their community needs. If you want to be angry at this issue, being mad at the company isn't the way to go. Anyway its a good write.
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GAP
Apr 19, 2004 21:59:43 GMT -5
Post by SilverEyes on Apr 19, 2004 21:59:43 GMT -5
Actually, this piece is directed primarily at the country. Most countries in South America lack a minimum wage and even if a country does have minimum wage it's not enforced. Also, unlike some Asian countries, the workers in South America are not allowed to form any type of union to protect workers' rights and raise wages. We won't even go into the fact that the sweatshops force the workers to take birth control and force abortions on pregnant workers.
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GAP
Apr 20, 2004 17:52:39 GMT -5
Post by KG on Apr 20, 2004 17:52:39 GMT -5
Ok I understand now. And yes I know that these shoppes seem to be a very bad thing. In this country they are. I see what you are saying about South America and the such. I thought that the recent talks about all the jobs in india is what started this piece. But from where you are standing I see your viewpoint.
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GAP
May 3, 2004 20:41:21 GMT -5
Post by rinna(on leave...for eternity) on May 3, 2004 20:41:21 GMT -5
very emotional, nice write
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