Wolf
Apprentice
In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
Posts: 124
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Tears I
Feb 18, 2004 20:48:45 GMT -5
Post by Wolf on Feb 18, 2004 20:48:45 GMT -5
Tears I
...For Dianna
You cried.
I saw you.
--a tiny stream of emotion was at last freed
and rolled silently down your unmarred face...
In its reflection I saw
something hidden away;
something that was gone again
in another second
as you brushed it quickly aside--
but, having seen it;
I won't be fooled again.
I saw
you.
© T. GhostWolf Davidson, June 12, 1970
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sweetest17sin
Virtuoso
don't frown! you never know who's falling in love with your smile!
Posts: 252
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Tears I
Feb 19, 2004 1:03:16 GMT -5
Post by sweetest17sin on Feb 19, 2004 1:03:16 GMT -5
that was really good....nice job!
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Tears I
Feb 19, 2004 8:44:47 GMT -5
Post by bloodredtears on Feb 19, 2004 8:44:47 GMT -5
awesome piece...i love the last bit "I see/you" that's awesome! great description...good job!
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Tears I
Feb 19, 2004 23:06:09 GMT -5
Post by SilverEyes on Feb 19, 2004 23:06:09 GMT -5
Wonderful write. I love the description of a tear as a, "tiny stream of emotion."
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amberputis
Virtuoso
~Dreams are determined by our hearts, and our dreams design the future~
Posts: 330
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Tears I
Feb 19, 2004 23:54:41 GMT -5
Post by amberputis on Feb 19, 2004 23:54:41 GMT -5
very good and simple, well written.
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Tears I
Feb 21, 2004 4:57:06 GMT -5
Post by richie on Feb 21, 2004 4:57:06 GMT -5
yes this is good, you achive a real Imagery in your poems I am no excpert on prose-free verse but I found this very appealing.
regards Richie.
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