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Post by Alex'z Death Chic on Feb 27, 2004 8:33:45 GMT -5
Damned for eternity in this godforsaken hell
I stand alone in the corners of the shadows
with no sign or even a tinge of faith in me
left with no will to carry on...
I've got nothing to live for
got no reason for my existence
no light in the darkest depths of my soul
without any hope for anything at all
Lost all chances for redemption
forced into silence in my own salvation
shunned aside into darkness by my thoughts
scared and frightened by my own making
There was nothing for me aside from hell
no life, no love, no paradise, no heaven
until you outstreched your hand and pulled me out
I was nothing until I found heaven in you...
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Eclipse
Apprentice
It's not a matter of luck, it's just a matter of time.
Posts: 222
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Post by Eclipse on Feb 27, 2004 11:14:40 GMT -5
i absolutly love this piece. i liked the transition to the last stanza.
Lost all chances for redemption
forced into silence in my own salvation
shunned aside into darkness by my thoughts
scared and frightened by my own making
^^that stanza really stuck with me. awesome write.
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Post by Alex'z Death Chic on Feb 27, 2004 11:34:26 GMT -5
cool. many thankies.  |
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Post by bloodredtears on Feb 27, 2004 19:07:20 GMT -5
There was nothing for me aside from hell
no life, no love, no paradise, no heaven
until you outstreched your hand and pulled me out
I was nothing until I found heaven in you...
that's my favorite stanza...lovely feeling in it...great job!
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Post by SilverEyes on Feb 28, 2004 0:18:47 GMT -5
The last stanza is beautiful. It really ties the poem together after describing your depression. Nice write.
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HeartInChains
Novice
if love isnt a game, then why are there so many playahz?
Posts: 16
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Post by HeartInChains on Feb 29, 2004 1:04:35 GMT -5
i absolutely love this gurl's use wit words.. ei, death chic? known her work for a while now.. well, more than a while.. shez my motivation tah make good poetry.. envy her talent.. hehe...ΓΌ keep up tha good work, baby marga!  |
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Post by Alex'z Death Chic on Feb 29, 2004 3:16:01 GMT -5
 I'm ur motivation? WOW. I never knew that!!!
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HeartInChains
Novice
if love isnt a game, then why are there so many playahz?
Posts: 16
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Post by HeartInChains on Feb 29, 2004 7:13:34 GMT -5
well now yah do!! ;D
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sweetest17sin
Virtuoso
don't frown! you never know who's falling in love with your smile!
Posts: 252
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Post by sweetest17sin on Mar 1, 2004 0:24:18 GMT -5
nice job. i love the last stanza!
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amberputis
Virtuoso
~Dreams are determined by our hearts, and our dreams design the future~
Posts: 330
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Post by amberputis on Mar 7, 2004 12:22:16 GMT -5
great write indeed. Fabulous job here!!
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Post by Charli on Mar 10, 2004 18:49:37 GMT -5
Amazing, that was great! Wonderful feeling and I agree with every one else, I love the last stanza.
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NeverMore
Virtuoso
Beethoven Looking f*g
Posts: 454
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Post by NeverMore on Apr 20, 2004 13:45:19 GMT -5
I saw this title and I thought it would be something like what I have read before... you sure proved that wrong... all the way through this work, I was thinking it sounded like the description of a hard hurt life, that last line lifted the whole work right up to warm happy smiles. This is a very special work! you should be very proud of it...
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Post by Mikepoet on Apr 27, 2004 20:53:35 GMT -5
What I got from it was how bad all was all the way up until the last two lines. I take to be how sudden you being saved was.
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Post by rinna(on leave...for eternity) on Apr 30, 2004 0:09:31 GMT -5
i enjoyed this. love changes everything, when you've never had it, when you find it, when it leaves you. nice write.
x rinna x
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Post by Alex'z Death Chic on May 1, 2004 22:16:43 GMT -5
wow... never thought i could get so many remarks from you guys on this one.... thanks  |
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