Dad

[rinna(on leave...for eternity)]

blood had nothing to do with
the way you loved me
and the way i loved you
when all the girls
whined and agonised
about how their dad
couldn't understand them
i smiled
because you never asked me
and never pried
as far as i was concerned
you earned that mug
of Number One Dad

hindsight has a funny way
of telling us how different
things really were
i knew you loved me
of that, i'm sure
i didn't see that
you never asked
because you had no say
you never fought
because you'd never win
you had no backbone
when it came to saving me
because in the end
blood had everything to do with it
and i fell through the cracks of your life

i wonder what it would've been like
if i told you more often
that i loved you
would things have turned out differently
if you stuck up for me
just one time?
while i drive myself to madness
swimming in whatifs
what keeps me from drowning
is the cold hard truth
that you never did.

---------------------------------
n.b. this is for my adoptive father, the only dad i've ever known.

[Seth]

One word; Wow.
As I read each line, it grew more compelling.
A terrific write.

[rinna(on leave...for eternity)]

seth,
thank you very much. this was a tough one to reread.
x rinna x

[Alex'z Death Chic]

rinna, the love you have for your father really shines through in this... Almost brought me to tears.

'as far as i was concerned
you earned that mug
of Number One Dad'

That hit me hard... because somehow, I'm jealous because you loved him so much and that he loved you too... I wish I could feel that way for my father... who was never there for me... who will never be...

[rinna(on leave...for eternity)]

ADC,
honey, i've been away, so i'm sorry i missed this. he was there, but he was never there, if you can understand that.
x r x