Cutting out the Extraneous

[Tania]

Cutting away the Extraneous
Cutting to the bone
Cutting along the fine line
Cutting out on my own
Cutting out your heart for mine
Cutting to the chase
Cutting my own soul so fine
Cutting my own space
Trying to minimise the obvious
Trying to simplify my life
Cutting the crap of psychodrama
Keeping and cutting out strife
To keep to a minimal experience
Keeping it so refined
Cutting my life into pieces
Just to buy myself some time-Tania Walsh-

[Chaotic_Thetis]

Hmm, now, when i read poetry with a great deal of repition, it either does two things. One, is that it drags down the poem, stretching it further than neccessary to the extent where i'm just skipping the repitition and reading the rest. Or, it adds to the poem, making the statement seem solid and hard hitting.
In this case, it was unfortunately not the latter. I liked the underlying message here, the idea behind the cutting, but it felt over used, and if it were toned down slightly it would be improved upon.

[bloodredtears]

well, i agree that there are too types of repetition, but i do believe that the repetition here works well because you don't keep it the same line over and over, you don't say "cutting away the extraneous" some repetition repeats the same line, here the diffent ways to CUT things makes it interesting, i think....i much enjoyed it...great job!

[SilverEyes]

It was a little redundant but I like it.

[Mikhael]

i agree, it was a little redundant, but that's ok. it was a good message, or idea or thought or whatever. i liked the line about psychodrama, it was nice, and everything after it, especially the last three. very powerful, final, desperate. good job.