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Post by DeadlySilence on Apr 15, 2004 13:00:53 GMT -5
innocent eyes. numbed heart. lost soul left to wander - alone. locked up mind.
remove this blade from my hand. wipe the blood from my wrists. dry the tears in my eyes.
retreating back. rebuilding walls. letting go. wandering around lost in side and out.
remove me from your heart. wipe me from your memory. forget me and my love for you.
can’t be fixed. can’t be made whole. no need to live without a heart to love. no need to be found for i’ll only be found dead.
remove the fake smile from your face. wipe the blood up from the floor. dry the tears from your eyes.
empty eyes sealed shut. soul lost. no longer breathing. no longer screaming. broken body found dead.
4-15-2004
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Post by X x K e l Z x X on Apr 16, 2004 14:39:51 GMT -5
Interesting format for this piece, very well write
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Post by DeadlySilence on Apr 16, 2004 15:12:53 GMT -5
Thank you!
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Avatre
Novice
Just around for the words...^.^
Posts: 33
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Post by Avatre on Apr 16, 2004 18:10:22 GMT -5
I like the idea of it. Could there perhaps be a better title? The title seems to represent only a small section of the poem, rather than encompassing the whole. It's like a story...nice job. ^.^
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Post by DeadlySilence on Apr 16, 2004 23:22:27 GMT -5
Thank you.
Yeah, I got stuck on the title. do you have any suggestions?
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Post by bloodredtears on Apr 17, 2004 16:31:55 GMT -5
wonderful piece you have here...i loved the entire thing...the last two stanzas were my fav... great job!
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Post by DeadlySilence on Apr 17, 2004 19:20:26 GMT -5
Thank you!
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